hell & back.

i'm sitting at a starbucks in manhattan right now. it's about 33*C [= 91*F] outside, but it sure feels like at least a hundred. i just got a passion iced tea for free and i'm about to hang out at central park before heading back to germany. life is good at the moment. life has been more than amazing the past 2.5 weeks.
i was alive, like really living. you know, when you don't have any time to waste on facebook.

i partied in the hamptons. i surfed out in the hamptons. i had beachday after beachday. days of bright sunshine and hardly any rain. i met amazing people and swam in lake michigan. i had more dates that ever in germany. i had a guy [and a half, haha] proposing to me. i stayed at houses you can only dream of, played beach-volleyball, went jet skiing, out on a boat to watch fireworks and a good friend made an amazing dinner for me during a hot summer night in chicago. life was good. so good.

now my heart is breaking because i gotta go back. and everything people tell me is that it is the same everywhere and it's all about the way i see things. this makes me freakin' mad. because it is NOT the same everywhere. especially not in germany. read through the things above and tell which ones of those have happened to you during the past 2.5 weeks.
thank you. people are different, landscapes are different and there are different possibilities.

when do you get to drive in a convertible across the states listening to reggae? when do you try something new every day of your life?

and it is all connected to the place and the people. you start to worry less and have more fun. you become yourself. things fall into place even if you have nothing figured out. you just go with it.
and you can not do this everywhere. if you have traveled and stayed in a foreign country for a while you start to see the differences. people are not the same. they have different beliefs, different ways to see their life. some take it serious, others not so much. and it still works. some enjoy themselves more than others.

it's about choosing the right kind of livestyle for yourself. and yes, for me the american way of living life just suits me. and yes, i tried to live like that in germany. and no, it did not work out. no, people are not the same out there.

when was the last time that people you just met invited you to stay with them?
when was the last time someone offered you to stay with them for 3 months for free?
when was the last time you made more than 3 new friends within two weeks?

i choose to be happy almost all the time, but there are places where it works better than others. sometimes, when you welcome the world with open arms and a wide smile, you get nothing but bitchy comments.

and sometimes, that happy, loving girl finds her home.